Have you ever had a loved one who refused to admit they had an addiction? Sometimes everyone else can see the signs, but the one with the addiction refuses to admit the hold it has on them. Denial is a powerful force that prevents us from accepting the truth. This happens in a thousand different ways every day. Some people refuse to accept that they have gained a few pounds. Others cannot accept that their relationship has ended.
The Power of Denial and Addiction
Denial is a powerful mechanism that often fuels addiction, creating a vicious cycle that perpetuates destructive or self-defeating behaviors. When an individual is in denial, they refuse to acknowledge the reality of their addiction, rationalizing their actions and minimizing the consequences. This mental block prevents them from seeking help, as they fail to see the severity of their condition. As the addiction deepens, denial grows stronger, making it even more challenging to break free. The brain's reward system becomes hijacked by the addictive substance or behavior, reinforcing the denial as the individual increasingly prioritizes their addiction over everything else in their life. Without confronting and overcoming denial, the grip of addiction tightens, often leading to severe physical, emotional, and social consequences.[1]
At its core, denial is the inability of a person to accept the true nature of one’s circumstance. It sounds easy to look at your life and see that your actions are driving people away, causing you to lose job after job, or taking all the money you can make to support your habit. Most people could suffer any of these consequences and stop whatever was causing them. But drugs and alcohol complicate things.
Addiction is not a Weakness — Acceptance is Key
Drugs and alcohol cause physical and psychological dependence.[2] Despite decades of research to the contrary, many people still see addiction as a moral failing or weakness. Consequently, admitting to an uncontrollable addiction means acknowledging that a substance has gained control over one's life and that they are not strong enough to quit on their own.
Related: Substance Abuse Recovery 101 – Understanding Treatment Programs
When someone admits they do have substance abuse disorder, the next logical step would be to get help. However, that means that they can no longer use the thing they enjoy the most. They will typically have to go through a period of withdrawal as well that is both painful and psychologically distressing. Add to this how most of their close friends likely use drugs as well. Therefore, they will probably have to stop associating with their friends, make new friends, or be alone through what is already an incredibly difficult time. Accepting that you have an addiction entails accepting the truth of all of these realities, which can feel overwhelming.
Often a person will be hesitant to acknowledge these thoughts. So, on the outside, this looks like the person refuses to accept the obvious — that they have a substance use addiction. Acceptance is always the first step to change. You cannot change a problem that you do not believe exists.
The primary step in recovery is moving a person from the mindset of denial to acceptance. Moving toward acceptance can come in many forms, but the most common way is through consequences. If you have ever heard the term “rock bottom” you may realize that it is a metaphor for suffering the epitome of consequences. However, if you have known many people with addictions, you know that rock bottom is different for everyone.
The consequences that it takes for people to accept their disease of addiction vary from person to person. Therapeutic techniques such as motivational interviewing can hasten the process and get people to the acceptance stage faster. Acceptance is a powerful force. Once you accept that you have an addiction you are free to work to overcome it.
Related: How to Cope with Substance Use Disorders
Taking the Steps to Addiction Recovery
Acceptance of the addiction is just the first step to recovery. As you can see, it can be a major step. We are born with free will and human beings do not want to accept that anything has control over us. To do so can make us feel helpless. It is a hard thing to feel helpless over a substance that leads you to cause so much destruction. Imagine that you woke up one day and had destroyed everything in your house, everyone was angry at you, some people wouldn’t even speak to you, and you are not sure why you did any of it. Think of the anguish you would feel knowing how much you have hurt the ones you love.
The next step in recovery is acceptance of all the damage you have done to those you love. People must accept that they put their feelings, or rather a substance, before anyone and anything in their life. Now the thing they had used to run from their problems is the cause of all their problems. The trick is to accept what they have done without being consumed by guilt and shame. Someone in recovery must accept what they have done to hurt others, yet not let that define who they are going forward. We make mistakes, mistakes don’t make us.
Once someone has accomplished this, healing comes more readily. As you can see, the road to recovery leads through acceptance. Only when we stop denying the truth and accept our circumstances can we overcome them. Recovery from addiction and substance abuse involves so much more than accepting your addiction, but the sooner acceptance is achieved and the decision to stop using has been made, the sooner the healing can begin.
If you or a loved one are suffering from addiction or substance use disorders, we’re here for you at Lake Point Wellness and Recovery. Give us a call at 1-833-4HANDUP or fill out our contact form to learn more.
[1] https://www.apa.org/topics/addiction/denial
[2] https://nida.nih.gov/research-topics/addiction-science/drugs-brain-behavior-science-of-addiction
